This is the story of the saying “You don’t know Jack Schitt!”, which refers to the other party as not knowing anything about what they are speaking of.
Jack Schitt is the only son of O. Schitt.
O. Schitt, the fertilizer magnate, married Awe Schitt, who later ran the Kneedeep Inn-Schitt.
Jack Schitt eventually married Noe Schitt, and together they produced six children.
Holy Schitt, their first child, passed on shortly after birth. Next, came twin sons, Deep Schitt and Dip Schitt and then two daughters, Fulla Schitt and Giva Schitt. Their final child, another son, was named Bull Schitt.
In the meantime Deep Schitt married Dumb Schitt, a high school dropout.
Dip Schitt married Lotta Schitt and they had a son, Chicken Schitt.
Fulla Schitt and Giva Schitt married the Happens Brothers.
The Schitt-Happens children are Dawg Schitt, Bird Schitt and Horace Schitt.
Bull Schitt just married a spicy number, Pisa Schitt and they are expecting the arrival of Baby Schitt.
So now you know the full story of Jack Schitt and his family… just in case someone should ask.